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Celebrating My Six-Year Self Marriage Anniversary

Recently I celebrated my six-year Self marriage anniversary. When I lived in Oakland in 2016, I had a Shamanic ceremony where I was witnessed in stating personal vows, slipped on a sacred promise-ring, and committed to choosing and loving my Self.

Self marriage is my way of remembering to love and care for my Self—always, and in all ways.

Yes, I still date. And, I am actually ready and desirous of a deep intimate partnership with another—open to a set-up, btw—in case you know anyone for me!

Self marriage is my declaration that I am sovereign and that my relationship with myself is grounded in wholeness, Self responsibility, and love sourced from within.

Living in this form, I am often seeking any ways where I block Self love.

One story popped up recently that felt big for my healing—and worthy of sharing in hopes it helps you too.

The story goes like this …

Once upon a time there was an innocent and impressionable little girl. She was raised in a kind-hearted home in New Jersey and was blessed with an abundance of love from her parents. Growing up, this little girl enjoyed watching Saturday morning cartoons, Disney movies, Hollywood romcoms, and Broadway theatre. Without knowing it at the time, the subconscious message she internalized—from media, societal norms and her family of origin—was: find a man to marry and he will “save you.” You know, like a Prince Charming.

(This little girl is me, in case you couldn’t tell!)

And this story creeps in and runs me, often.

It is a story that can have me seek approval outside of my Self. It is the story that can have me give my power away. It is a story that can have me outsource love.

The truth is—no one can save us—except for our Self.

No one can make us make us feel happy or confident—except for our Self.

No one can make our dream job or life goals happen—except for our Self.

Shifting emotions, loving our Self, and having the business and life we deeply desire is an inside job.

That’s why on my Self marriage anniversary—while cleansing my body in the Chama River in New Mexico—I released this fantasy story. I let it go downstream so that I could be closer to my Self and love me, even more.

Knowing that falling in love and partnering with another will not save me—because, only I can do that.

Now of course, I know, being in partnership has it’s blessings and perks and can absolutely be an incredible support system—it’s just not the “rescue-relationship” that so many of us were conditioned to believe is what makes us live happily ever after. .

Have you also been told and unintentionally bought into a story about a man (or woman) saving you?

Send me back a quick reply with a YES or NO (and any other details you want to share!)—if you are willing—I’d love to hear your thoughts on this!

Thanks for your read here.

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I sincerely hope so!

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