And guess what!?
It re-wired me.
It re-ignited me.
It reminded me of myself.
I’ve been transparent with you about my relationship uncoupling.
Something I return to—and know well from moving through many seasons of transition—is doing something different.
Whether it’s a relationship, an empty nest, a career pivot, or peri/menopause—doing something new can be deeply supportive.
Not because you need to run away from yourself, the people you love, or your responsibilities …
But because sometimes the same old, same old keeps reflecting an old version of you back to you. And after a while, you can start to feel stuck and forget that there is another way to live.
That’s why I spent August in deep, wild nature in rural Portugal: to step outside my normal routines, experience myself in new ways, and support myself as I move through this transition.
I walked barefoot, got dirty, and had fun being feral.
I swam daily in rivers and waterfalls.
I lived in community, sharing meals, land projects, and stories.
I gave myself spaciousness to sleep past 9am, read for pleasure, nap before dinner, and stare at the stars.
I played on a ceramics wheel, received Reiki with a horse nearby, experienced a breathwork session, and witnessed my first-ever solar eclipse.
These things are not part of my normal day-to-day—especially a whole month of it.
And that was exactly what I was going for.
By the end of the month, I wasn’t just rested. I was remembering who I am when I’m not obsessing over my transition, lost in grief, or wondering what’s next.
I gave myself the chance to meet new parts of myself, old parts I hadn’t felt in a while, and parts I am only noticing now.
Because, when you are in a transition, it can be tempting to focus only on what’s ending or what is uncertain.
You may find yourself asking: Who am I now? What do I want? What comes next?
But sometimes those questions aren’t answered by thinking harder.
Sometimes, you need new experiences so that new answers have somewhere new to come from.
And if trying something new makes you nervous, you’re not alone. You don’t have to leap into the deep end. It can be a small, safe stretch—and still, something different.
It might mean taking a class, volunteering, writing, traveling, or doing something with no obvious purpose beyond curiosity and pleasure.
Doing something different …
Creates joy that isn’t dependent on your old life. It helps you collect evidence that you are still alive, still able to experience goodness, and that life can still surprise you.
Reminds you of what you enjoy, what brings you energy, and what you want more of in your next chapter.
Builds self-trust. You see that you can be in unfamiliar territory and still be okay. You can be a beginner and still belong. You can be in the mystery and still take the next step.
I am not suggesting you spend a month living in rural Portugal, although I highly recommend it!
I am inviting you to create space for something different, and to notice what becomes possible when you do.
What is something different that you could try this week? A walk somewhere new, a conversation that feels nourishing, a creative project?
In trying something different, you may just give yourself a gift for this transition …
A loving reminder that you are still alive. That your life is not over because one version of it has ended. That there are still experiences and parts of yourself available to you, and the possibility of creating a life that feels more fully your own.
If you’re in a midlife transition, what is something different you feel curious to try? Something that might make you feel more alive and remind yourself that there is still more possible for you? If something comes to mind and you’d like to share send me an email. My inbox is always open to you, and I promise to respond!